Author’s Note: Will anybody know what the difference between right and wrong, a lot of people will think its wrong but who is to tell you it’s not. I wrote this piece because I really needed to get this story out. I think people need to know not everybody is going to think everybody is right. Many people will think that you are doing something wrong but you really aren't.
Right and wrong. What’s the difference? Some people may think you are doing something wrong, but at the same time you probably wouldn't care what the punishment is. Take it from somebody that might know what it feels like. I can tell you a little bit of my story that reflect right and wrongs and what your may be punishment. My friend and I had gone to Fox Brook Park and it was around middle of March where the water was still frozen. My friend had suggested that we go on the ice with our bikes and at that point I did go but I knew that there was some type of feeling inside of me telling me not to go, Idid it anyways. My friend was already biking on the ice like there was no tomorrow.... then was that weird feeling in me that I knew that something wasn’t right, but instead I totally ignored that feeling. Then at that moment I hear my friend shout "Come on Maria, it's not like we will get in trouble for doing this" "Brooke shouted to me.
As I was waiting on the edge of the ice I heard Brooke call me again “Maria come on, nothing is going to happen.” I went on the ice not even thinking about what is going to happen. Just a couple minutes after I was on the ice with Brooke we heard something shout in the distance “You guys better get off the ice before I call the cops.” We didn’t think that she was going to call the cops, but we did as she said and got off the ice. As we were biking home we saw a cop driving through the walkways asking people if they knew who was on the ice. When the cop made it to us he first asked us if we were the people on the ice. I didn’t know what to say so I lied and said no we were not on the ice with your bikes. Then he asked if we knew the people on the ice and we answered no we did not.
Me and Brooke raced home, we didn’t know if the cop was going to follow us or not, we just didn’t know what to expect. When we got home we promised each other that we wouldn’t tell anybody this story. From that day forward I have not told anybody this story, until I wrote this piece. When Brooke left my house and went home I really didn’t know why I was that scared we couldn’t have gotten in trouble for doing something that we didn’t know that it was wrong.
How are people supposed to know that they are doing something wrong without knowing it is? That’s the problem, Brooke and I didn’t know that it was wrong until somebody said we were not supposed to go the ice. Even though we didn’t know it was wrong other people thought it was. Which is perfectly okay because not everybody will think it is okay to do things that we are doing.
You have very good dialogue throughout your piece. Maybe you could fix the "tense" of different words though. Overall though, the message really comes out that your expressing.
ReplyDeleteThis is a really good piece! I like how you really express how you and Brooke didn't know that what you were doing was wrong. I can just imagine how guilty you felt... However, you do have some grammatical errors, like dialogue and things. Also, there are some tense issues, but only a few. Overall it was a really good piece. Keep up the good work!
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